If one decided to suddenly conduct an interview with Lark McCarthy from The Lightcatcher, it would go something like this:
Me: "I'm so very glad you have decided to sit down with me today. Thank you."
Me: "So...first of all, let's talk about Fin."
Me: "Well, as we know, Fin has been getting to know you more and more lately, hasn't she?"
Lark: "I suppose so."
Lark: "And what?"
Me: "Well, what do you know about her?"
Lark: "Other than she has a good head for heights and should never have scratched her name off the list? Not much, 'side from the fact she's an artist and that no other idiot would put a scoop of raspberry preserves in perfectly good black coffee. Oh, and she's a good dancer. I hear she can't sing a lick, though."
Me: "How do you feel about her?"
Me: "Yes. Feel. Also known as "affection". Do you have any for her?"
Lark: "Affection can go both ways."
Me: "Fine. Romantic affection."
Lark: "Are you asking if I have any romantic affection for Fin Devens?"
Lark: *smoothly* "No, I don't think so. Can we move on?"
Lark: "Why not?"
Me: "Because you're MY blasted character, alrighty? You do what I say! If I want you to like Fin, LIKE HER!"
Lark: *scoffs* "Ha."
Me: "I'll cut you out! I'm warning you...." *Draws breath, calms down.* "Now, let me ask you again, do you have any romantic affection for Fin?" *waggles eyebrows*
Lark: "Why would I?"
Me: "BECAUSE SHE'S YOUR LOVE INTEREST, BLAST IT! AND YOU'D BETTER GET HER QUICK BEFORE BRIT DANIELS OR SONTY BRANNIGAN STEPS IN AND DOES IT FOR YOU, YOU BLOODY IDIOT!"
Lark: *Unruffled* "I see."
Me: "NO, NO YOU DON'T SEE. YOU DON'T SEE ANYTHING. YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY? YOU'RE BLIND! YOU'RE BLIND AS A BAT, AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, AND YOU'RE DRIVING ME UP THE WALL!"
Lark: "I think the interview is over."
Me: "YEAH, YOU'RE BLOOMIN' RIGHT IT'S OVER. LEAVE. AND GO TALK TO FIN!"
So, yeah, folks. There you go. Lark McCarthy 101.